Bonerstuck The Show

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Bonerstuck The Show

Post  ambienceTyrant on Fri Jan 11, 2013 4:45 pm

Basically a bunch of shitty fan fics (is that what they are called???) about us. This can include your shipping stories or stories about what would happen supposing we all lived together in an apartment. Not that it matters but i made the setting in my FIRST story if you care to keep using that apartment go ahead (maybe make it a series haha?) Anyone can post have fun.
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Re: Bonerstuck The Show

Post  ambienceTyrant on Fri Jan 11, 2013 6:03 pm

Noah slowly creaked open the door to the apartment, being sure to keep those stereotypical stalks of celery coming out of the grocery bag in front of his face. He is literally never prepared to see the result of him being gone for more than an hour. And not-so-surprisingly, the first thing he sees is a pile of sheets and shit in the middle of the floor, probably from an orgy that took place between Brax, Andrea, the Apartment Manager, and anyone else who wasn't busy fucking something else up. Their clothes mostly covered the kitchen counter, including bowls of cereal and other festering stuff. What makes those Cinnamon Toast Crunches so delicious? Probably the bra that has been floating in it for an hour.

Placing the groceries on the counter, he moved into the kitchen to see what happened in there. First he noticed the fridge, which was wearing a coat of duct tape, no doubt Dan's work. He swears, that kids prankster gambit seriously needs to calm the fuck down, or its gonna wind up with a shoe up its ass.

Now reluctant to clean shit up, Noah moves on to the living room to see make sure the rest of the house hasn't been equally fucked with. Making sure not to step in the dog/cat shit on the way, he gets to the seemingly untouched living room. It stinks horrendously of animal piss, but none of it matters because the sight of all of them snuggled together on the couch is the most adorable fucking thing in all of reality. A sudden mumbling catches Noah's attention behind him. Apparently Aaron has been duct tape to an horrendously over-sized cross the entire time. You have no idea how or why it is there, most likely due to a stupid joke taken way too far. You consider taking him down, but decide to go flip your shit at everybody first before he starts "shredding".

Noah takes a deep sigh as he mentally prepares himself for the collaborative efforts of both Austin and Jeff as he approaches HIS room. The slightly open door breezes open to allow him to "behold their majesty". Bad Dragon print-outs lined the room with shitty orange penises scrawled all over them. "So I heard you like porn, so I put porn on your porn so you can bone while you fuck." They take the ironic shit you say WAY too seriously. And it seems they settled into NOAH'S BED AND FUCKED afterwards.

Closing the door behind him, Noah takes a painful breathe of air after a much needed face palm, as he counts up how many more people he needs to check on. Ezra and Issac are probably harmlessly playing with Dan or were involved in the orgy, as they typically would. Alice *hopefully* has been drawing something or is hanging with whats-his-face in her room.

Suddenly remembering that Chris is unaccounted for, Noah shrieks and sprints through the house with no regard as to what may end up on his shoes. Chris could probably single-handedly fuck up the entire fucking city if he was let out of his room. Hell, he could probably fuck it up from his room given that he has a computer. Noah exhales with great relief as he gets to Chris' room and sees all the locks still firmly in place and hears a subtle meowing from within. The only person left is Evelyn, which best case scenario is innocently toying with her cosplay shit, although she could potentially be doing Satanic Rituals. I mean, you never know WHO is doing that shit. Noah slides down the wall, into the fetal position, and stays that way for some time.

THE END.
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Re: Bonerstuck The Show

Post  ambienceTyrant on Fri Jan 11, 2013 6:29 pm

She had fallen.
She had fallen, tripped over a branch, and they were coming for them.
"Oh my god," Alice ran back towards her, "Evelyn, get up, we have to go!"
Evelyn moaned, trying to push her self back up, before wincing in pain. "My ankle..." She said, "I can't get up on it."
Alice looked around, hearing his own blood pump through his ears. They were getting closer, and he wasn't sure if they'd make it out in time.
"Listen," He said, propping her up against a tree, "I'm going to get you out of here safe, I promise."
He pulled the rifle off his back and began to take a few steps away.
"What?" Evelyn called, "What the fuck are you doing?"
"I'm keeping you safe," Alice said, turning to smile at the injured girl, "I will fight to keep you safe."
The first shots were heard, and with that, he was off, a ruthless machine made only to protect Evelyn. After all, that's what he was there for.
-- Andrea
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Re: Bonerstuck The Show

Post  ambienceTyrant on Fri Jan 11, 2013 7:10 pm

Issac and Noah strolled down the street. They felt real fuckin' cool right now. They felt like mobsters. And they felt like they were about to do something BIG. It may have been from the crack, they have no idea. Suddenly they were on a bus with really huge guns and police were in pursuit. Issac’s heart seemed to stop for a moment, and he thought about his life. He looked at the people he was aiming his gun at, and he thought really deep. I may never have this chance again. He bent his head, and turned to Noah. And he confessed his love as they kissed and got shot down by the cops.
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Nepeta x Noah

Post  ambienceTyrant on Sat Jan 19, 2013 7:26 am

Noah's gaze stayed transfixed on the ground in front of him. He didn't know what to do, or what to say, he just sat with a storm of thoughts fighting in his head. His concentration broke as a gentle nudge rubbed the side of his face. Nepeta pushed Noah's head until her eyes met his stare. "What's wrong?" she whispered innocently. "I'm not sure... I.." He didn't know how to respond, mumbling off and returning his troubled stare towards the ground. Nepeta's tail relaxed into the cushions of the bed as her head fell forward a bit, resting on his shoulder. She meekly began fumbling with the buttons of her coat, peeling them out of their slots. Noah's hands caught hers suddenly, but softly. "No. You don't need to do that." She looked away from him, feeling a rush of blood to her face. Noah turned, burying his head into her cheek. She felt a tear beginning to form, but she shook it off and rested her hand on Noah's head. "It's alright." She stroked his head slowly as he fell asleep in her arms.
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Nepeta x Noah

Post  ambienceTyrant on Sat Jan 19, 2013 7:39 am

Nepeta and Noah hopped off the ground after landing from the tree, leaving a rustle of leaves behind them. They strode swiftly and silently across the forest floor, headed off after some tracks leading deeper in. They came to a sudden stop near a trickling stream, and Noah peered over a bush. "Hey, No-" Nepeta began to say, but Noah's finger landed on her lips to hush her. She playfully frowned back at him. "I don't see anything out there Nep, are you sure we are tracking it right?" She giggled, "I'd say we have been following it just purrfectly, hehe." Noah began to turn, a bit confused, "What do you mean?" Then Nepeta pounced, knocking him onto the ground. "I've been tracking you this whole time, silly."

(well shit this is kinda like austins first one with me and nepeta...)


Last edited by ambienceTyrant on Sat Jan 19, 2013 7:44 am; edited 1 time in total
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Re: Bonerstuck The Show

Post  ambienceTyrant on Sat Jan 19, 2013 7:39 am

God damn it, I'm not going to be able to stop this, am I?
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Nepeta x Noah

Post  ambienceTyrant on Sat Jan 19, 2013 3:51 pm

"Noah, I swear to jegus, I will claw open your cheeks if you don't smile fur one damn picture" Nepeta hissed as she tugged at the corners of Noah's mouth from behind. Noah attempted to say something, but with his mouth contorted it came out more like a blurb. Bending his arms over his back Noah attempted to pry her off, but he loses his balance and topples over with her. "Pff- hahaha!" A sudden flash cuts through Noah's laughter and he realizes what has happened. "Shit." "Its purrfect ;33" Nepeta giggles. "Give that to me!" "Nope nope nope, I have your smiles now." Noah flails about trying to get the camera from her while she squeals in laughter. "... If I actually smile for you, can you get rid of the picture? You know I hate those." Nepeta pawnders the idea, and then leans close to Noah. "Only if you smile fur me every day" And so he did.


Last edited by ambienceTyrant on Sun Jan 20, 2013 12:22 am; edited 1 time in total
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Nepeta x Noah

Post  ambienceTyrant on Sat Jan 19, 2013 4:37 pm

Noah adjusts his tie uncomfortably. He pats down his suit and and hair to make sure everything is looking right, but he still looks disappointed as he stares in the mirror. "Holy shit, I look terrible. I shouldn't even be allowed to be with someone as cute as you." Nepeta wanders over to Noah, adjusting an earring. "You look fine, really." Noah takes a last look and comments, "If you say so." "Which I do ;33" He turns to face Nepeta. "And how do you think I look?" She wore a spring green dress, clinging loosely to her shoulders and flowing down just past her knees. She meekly rubbed her arm and blushed awaiting Noah's answer. He stroked her cheek and told her, "You are beautiful. Now come on, we have to get to the party." Now happier, Nepeta replied, "You mean Purrty ;33" Noah chuckled and walked with her out to the car.


Last edited by ambienceTyrant on Sat Jan 19, 2013 5:15 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Re: Bonerstuck The Show

Post  ambienceTyrant on Sat Jan 19, 2013 4:37 pm

guise halp i cant stop
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Nepeta x Noah

Post  ambienceTyrant on Sat Jan 19, 2013 11:53 pm

Noah sent another responseless message to Nepeta. It hurt to send it everytime. He has no idea what happened, or where he went wrong. But he guesses that she is gone now. Noah drags himself down the hallway of their fort they built out in the woods. His tear-welled eyes glanced at all of her art left on the walls from when they were together. At this point, he figured, he might as well give it up. She was gone, and it was clear she wasn't coming back. Overwhelmed with emotions, Noah didn't know what to think. He felt mixes of guilt and sorrow and jealousy; Wanting Nepeta more than whoever she might be with in time to come, and guilt for wanting to take her love from her. When Nepeta found her way back to the house, wanting to take him back, she found it ablaze. She doesn't know whether he was still inside or not, but she guesses that their relationship is just a bittersweet memory now.
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Nepeta x Noah

Post  ambienceTyrant on Sun Jan 20, 2013 12:17 am

Nepeta sneaked up to Noah as he lie, sleeping in a pile of cushions and pillows and other really soft things. Biting back a giggle, she reached into her coat and grabbed a roll of stickers and some markers. A few giggles let out as she put ponies and rainbows all over Noah's face and headphones and doodled a mustache on his face. She stowed her things and toppled down the pile of cushions, darting out of the room. Noah let his grin show then, opening his eyes. She really is lucky she is so damn cute, these mischievous things she does to him would get some people killed.
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Re: Bonerstuck The Show

Post  ambienceTyrant on Sun Jan 20, 2013 12:30 am

i cant. actually stop myself now. there is no hope.
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Re: Bonerstuck The Show

Post  semblanceEclipsed on Wed Jan 30, 2013 8:52 pm

omgomgomg my talksprites so adorbs
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BonerStuck episode 2

Post  semblanceEclipsed on Fri Feb 15, 2013 5:45 pm

Austin patted out the ruffles of his robes carefully to make sure they were in order. He has to look his best when paying his respects to the Cage and bringing His followers together. He couldn't formally pray to Him while being outfitted to not formally pray to Him, why, those statements contradict each other! Bottles of Mountain Spew lined the table, all having been blessed already probably twice, and cold day old lunches dressed the table to feed the others while waiting on everyone.

Everyone trickled in over a few hours, until finally everyone arrived, save Alice who simply wouldn't put up with this "nonsense". They could finally begin whatever ceremony Austin had in mind. "As you are all aware, we have gathered here to celebrate the day of the Cage-- Isaac put away your gameboy." Isaac made a slight whimpering sound as he flicked off the power to his DS, while Dan quietly snickered from the otherside of the room. "Yeah you disrespectful cis scum." Ezra chimed in, only to have an empty bottle of Mountain Spew filled with trash smack him in the face. "Er hrm, as I was saying..." Austin continued through his prepared speech as Chris used his amazing talent of sneaking food to eat most of what was on the table. "And now... we must proprose a tribute to the Cage, as we toast with our boners."

Instantly awkward glances were abound, all aside from Jeff who was already naked and sexily oiled. One hand after another sprung into the air. "I don't have a dick." "Go sit in the corner and pray the Cage may forgive your inability to produce a boner." Evelyn walked over to the corner and pretended to think about her life for the sake of not getting lectured further by Austin. "Do I have to have two boners, or can just one work?" "Yes Andrea, one will be fine, although two would be preferable." At this point everyone was naked, but still seated. Noah's hand slowly made its way up. "I'm not aroused, how the fuck am I supposed to make this work with a limp dick." Andrea smartly remarked, "Oh come on, THIS ass hasn't aroused you yet?" She slowly rubs her ass, and at the same time a high pitched yelp emits from the end of the table, "HNNNNGF". Austin immediately responds, "Aaron what the fuck that's disgusting, get the fuck out go sit in the hall." Aaron limped out a bit embarassed, while receiving a glare from Brax, who was also signalling with her index and middle finger that she'd be keeping an eye on him. "Luckily, Noah, I came prepared for your inability to become aroused." He snagged a remote off of the table and activated a TV, which began to reveal a slide show of bad-dragon art and products. In the end, they all jousted boners in honor of the Cage. And it was fucking amazing.
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